iPhone 4, you're the most beautiful thing. Holding you—so solid, so smooth, your zowielala screen glowing—makes me greedy. My precious. I want to lick you. I can't stop looking at you. But your industrial design is a failure.

Don't get me wrong. Like I said back when we found you, you are oh so pretty. But after holding you, after seeing some of the glaring problems you have, I have to surrender to the facts.

Your industrial design sucks because, despite your sheer beauty, your blazing speed, and having the best software in any smartphone today, Jon Ive and his team didn't completely follow their beloved Dieter Rams' guidelines for good design.

First and foremost, the rule that good design has to be durable. Good design has to stand the pass of time both aesthetically and physically. Good design has to age gracefully. The object, whatever it is, can't get easily scratched. Its surface can't easily shatter. It has to perdure. It has to arrive to the future and feel at home and natural.

Then, good design also has to be thorough. Nothing must be left to chance. And good design has to make a product useful. It has to show respect to the user by providing the function it claims with perfection and accuracy. Its form has to follow function to its final consequences.